


Afterward

by Artistic_Visions



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-08
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2020-11-27 10:16:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20946692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Artistic_Visions/pseuds/Artistic_Visions
Summary: This is a post Wayward Son fanfic building straight off the ending of the book.(so if you haven't yet read Wayward Son this story will confuse you I'm sorry!) It ties back to Carry On as it shows the journey of Simon finding out who his parent are (yes! finally!), Simon and Baz rebuilding their relationship after the depressing mess they were in Wayward Son (no hate yall just facts), and Penelope growing out of the familiar place she was in with Micha.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yay! okay this is the first Fanfic I've ever written so please(!) be patient. So this is just chapter one, I'm not sure how many chapters there will be yet but I plan to keep editing it and adding more chapters. I will also be posting this on Wattpad so if there are any troubles, don't fret! There are other places to view this story.  
Leave comments and let me know what yall think! :)

**Penelope**  
As we drove away, Baz and I poured everything we had left into healing Simon. It took us about an hour to get out of that desert and back into a semi civilized area. I don’t know how we managed magic in that Quiet Zone, but it didn’t matter as long as we kept Simon alive. I don’t know who was more freaked out about it though, me or Baz. Never mind, I got it, it’s definitely Baz. He held his wand in one hand, to cast spells, and Simon’s hand in the other; he didn’t let go for the whole car ride. They seem to have a lot of these moments right after they’ve almost died; like they can only manage to find the words when their lives are facing imminent danger, or in recent cases afterwards.  
We drive for another hour before we reach Agatha’s apartment. She didn’t talk at all on the drive. She watched Baz with careful eyes and a blank face. I think this whole retreat gone wrong thing has made her wearier of her surroundings. When she left England, she knew Baz was a vampire, but it didn’t really matter considering she was running away from everything she had ever known. Now I think she’s realizing that when she ‘ran away from magic’, she wasn’t actually running away from magic because there is no running from it. Magic is everywhere, and sandy California beaches aren’t going to change that. After a while she looked to me, then at Shepard, then back at me with a questioning look on her face. Suddenly realizing there was a normal in the car she became weary of him too. I nodded at her as if to say, “It’s okay, he’s saved our lives multiple times now. We can trust him.” She nods back then returns her eyes to Baz and Simon. I turn around in my seat and face the road. “Where are we,” I asked Shepard. “Probably about half-way through California by now. We passed a sign that said we entered it before we left the Quiet Zone,” he said. He too has been rather quiet, which is really strange for him. This whole thing has royally mind fucked everyone, and rightfully so.

**Baz**  
Simon was unconscious the entire two hours it took us to get to Welblove’s flat. They shot him up so bad I’m seriously concerned the magic Bounce and I have been pouring into him won’t help. It isn’t like we can take him to a real hospital. I mean honestly what would we say? “Please help my boyfriend who has wings and a tail that can’t be removed. We think he’s dying.” I mean we’ve broken every other law the World of Mages has, what’s one more? As if we had anything left after the fight, Penelope and I kept dumping as much magic as we could into him. She’s drained, and technically so am I but I don’t care I keep casting until we get to Welblove’s flat. She didn’t take her eyes off of us the entire drive. I don’t know if it’s the, I snatched your boyfriend right after you broke up with him because you liked me thing, or if it’s the vampire thing. I’m thinking maybe a bit of both at this point. I don’t rather mind it though, not as much as Simon would, I’m too tired and thirsty to care. I’m used to looking at Simon while he sleeps, I mean I did it all the time when we were at Watford. It’s just that this is a different kind of sleep. This is a damn near lifeless sleep, like he’s just barely hanging on and to be honest, he is.  
Finally we pulled up at Agatha’s flat, and she was the first one out of the car, I don’t think it was even parked yet, but whatever. She jumped out and wasn’t even three feet from the car before she was vomiting. Bounce hot on her tail to hold her hair back. These two are so predictable. What wasn’t predictable though, was Shepard asking if I needed help getting Simon inside. I of course said no – politely, give me a little credit – because ultimately my undeadness gave me super strength and I didn’t want ANYONE touching Simon. I knew he was going to pull through; he had to. I can’t even think of what I would do if I lost Simon. No, I won’t think about it because it won’t happen. I carry him up four flights of stairs because, for some odd reason, the lift is broken. Agatha pulled herself together enough to unlock the door for us and of course made a run for the loo the minute the door was open. I gently lay Simon down on the couch and pull up a kitchen chair by his side. I want to be here when he wakes up. If he wakes up.  
After about ten minutes of me feeling about as dead as Simon looks, Penny walks up behind me and places a gentle hand on my shoulder, “Baz, you should hunt-“ I cut her off with a firm, “No.” “Baz, I don’t have enough energy to be casting healing spells on both of you. Please, go hunt, come back and rest. It’s been a long day, I’ll stay with him,” she says. I know she’s right, but I just can’t bring myself to leave him. “What if he wakes up while I’m gone? I don’t-“ now she’s cutting me off, “Basil. I don’t want to argue about this with you, I’m not sure of much right now, however, I’m fairly certain he won’t wake up in the twenty minutes it will take you to hunt. One of us has to be able to cast and I’m damn near burnt out and you actually are. There isn’t much you can do for him sitting here so please go make yourself well so that there’s someone here for him to wake up to.” I look from Simon, to Penny, to Agatha, who just appeared in the doorway looking like a ghost. “She’s right Baz, you won’t be very useful to him if he wakes up to find you dead,” she says. I look back to Simon, “Alright. I’ll go.” I slowly rise from the chair and lean over to kiss him on the forehead. Bounce hugs me as I walk past to the door, and I don’t try to stop her.

**Shepard**  
I offered to help him. Four flights of stairs are a lot to carry Simon’s limp body, but no he wanted to be stubborn. I tried the elevator button like twenty times before Agatha stumbled through the door saying that it was broken. Penelope helped Agatha up the stairs, Baz carried Simon, and I did nothing but follow like a lost puppy. Baz stayed by Simon’s side for as long as he could until Penelope made him get up and go hunt. With us being in the middle of a city, I’m not sure what he’s gonna find to drink. I would have offered to go with him but for two reasons I didn’t even bother: number one, he definitely needed to be alone with his thoughts, and number two, I vaguely recall hearing Penelope and Simon talk about letting him hunt alone because of being fang shy. So, I stood back and watch the whole exchange from the kitchen. He finally agreed to go and as he walked towards the door Penelope stopped him with a hug. From what I’ve seen, they don’t exactly seem like the hugging type of friends, which is why I’m surprised he allowed her to hug him. Agatha has been sick ever since I parked the car, she came in to help Penelope get Baz to go hunting and now she’s standing beside me in the kitchen. “Are you alright?” I asked her. “Did they bite you?” she asked in return looking at my neck where I had indeed been bitten. “Why are you avoiding my question?” I asked in a jokingly accusing tone of voice. “Why are you avoiding mine?” she replied. Sassy. I wasn’t avoiding her question; I just think it’s rather obvious that I was bitten. I mean, one look at my neck would tell you that, and considering I’ve only been around two types of people for the past few days, it’s a little obvious that I was bitten by a vampire. She looks at me and nods, “I’m used to this. I dated Simon for six years,” Really? “This was basically everyday life.” What does she mean by that? I decide not to ask, she’s had a rough day and I don’t particularly think I’m making it much better.  
Penelope sits with Simon until Baz returns. He slowly opened and closed the door somehow looking sores than when he left, but at least he had a bit of color to him now. Penelope stood up and gave him the seat back without a word. She waved me into the spare bedroom of the apartment that was clearly for guests. “Let’s give them some privacy,” she said before closing the door. There’re a few minutes of awkward silence before I give in and break it, “He’s gonna be okay, yeah?” She nods her head, clearly distraught and I mean I don’t blame her. Simon, her best friend, is lying half dead out there on the couch and it’s clearly bothering her not to be by his side. She stands in the corner lost in thought and it give me a chance to examine her for the first time all day. She borrowed a silky periwinkle pair of Agatha’s pajamas. They barely fit her due to the curves that she has that Agatha does not. She had tugged her hair down out of the ponytail she wore her hair in all the time and now it was hanging loosely around her shoulders in a giant frizz. It framed her face well. She should wear her hair down more often, though that would provide a disadvantage during fights. They seem to get into a lot of fights. She looked up and caught me staring. I didn’t turn away because I wasn’t ashamed, and I’m glad I didn’t. A bright pink redness rose in her cheeks and I realized I’ve never seen her blush before.


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> School work is literally killing me right now. Lol. This update took a lot longer than I wanted and I'm thinking they're all gonna be a little irregular and I'm super sorry...  
:)  
Enjoy ~ A.V.

**Baz**

_ Why? Why my beloved Simon? Couldn’t it have been me? Next time let me take the bullets. I’ll live. You might not._

When I walked through the door, everything was exactly how I left it. Penelope by his side, Shepard in the kitchen, and Agatha nowhere in sight. I walk in and try to shut the door quietly. Everything seems to be moving in slow motion; maybe it’s the fact that I’m tired or that for the first time in over a year, I fear those beautiful blue eyes may never look at me again the way they did that night in the truck. I walk to the couch and squat to sit on the floor next to Penelope, but she stands up, “Here. I’m going to bed,” she says. I pause unsure if I’ve pushed her from a spot at his side. She gives me one of those big-eyed looks again, like she did before she hugged me earlier. She doesn’t hug me again, but this look is her silently consoling me. I close my eyes and nod. She heads toward the washroom, “Penelope,” she turns around, “thank you,” is all I manage to say. She walks in and shuts the door. I sit down in the chair at Simon’s side and pick up his right hand. I lean forward and suddenly I’m crying. I bring his hand up to my mouth and place a gentle kiss upon the knuckle. _You have to wake up, you just have to._

Penelope comes out of the bathroom with puffy, red eyes – she’s been crying. She wears a pair of periwinkle silk pajamas that are form fitting but not too small – they belong to Agatha. “Shepard,” she says, she stands in the doorway of the guest room and waves him in. He acts like he’s been called to the principal’s office, but I think she just wanted to give me my space. _Once again, thank you Penelope_. I sit and stare at Simon, he’s beautiful, even in this half dead state. His hair was laying across his forehead, I push it back the way he would’ve. We didn’t bother to remove anything off of him before we laid him down so I do what I can to make him comfortable. I untie and slide off his shoes, I empty the pockets of his jacket – we can remove that tomorrow when he wakes up, wash it and get the blood out. There wasn’t much in there, just little pieces of paper and receipts, stuff like that. I set it all on the end table near his head. That’s about as much as I can do, but I grab a blanket and drape it across him. I’ll clean the blood out if it bothers Agatha that much. There seem to be blankets everywhere, So, out of the large selection, I chose a soft blue-grey blanket that seems to be about 6 feet long. I lay most of it across him and a little bit on my lap. I pick his hand back up, lean over, and kiss his forehead. We stay like this until morning.

**Penelope**

I let Baz have some alone time with Simon tonight. I’ll need a clear head for tomorrow for this inevitable conversation about what to do next. It’s been a long day and I haven’t legitimately slept in a week, but because I know how my brain works, I don’t even bother attempting to go to sleep. Simon is out there on that couch suffering and for the first time in years I feel totally useless. If I hadn’t invited Shepard into the room, I’d be crying right about now. _That’s why I invited him in here, to ease my mind off of Simon. But, once again, he’s quiet, too quiet._ I look up and am met with his big brown eyes staring right at me. I’m taken aback by this though. _How did I not see him staring at me? He isn’t trying to hide it, and normally I’m more perceptive of my surroundings._ With my mind having been lost in thought, I didn’t even notice. He actually has a tiny hint of a smile on the sharp corners of his lips. I feel a wave of nausea come on and the insane amount of heat rising in my face is deadly. _What in the world is happening to me?_ I attempt to hold his gaze for as long as possible. I don’t quite understand if it was a staring contest or a challenge or what. I know one thing for sure. In all that staring, I think I’m beginning to realize that there’s something here that wasn’t here before, or at least I was too occupied to notice.

The window is open, so the curtain gently lifts itself from the wall every couple of seconds. The small yellow light casts a golden glow across the room, and Shepard’s dark skin. He looks _good._ Really good. The staring has gone on for long enough. I walk over and sit next to him on the bed. I want to ask where he would be most comfortable sleeping, but for some reason the words just won’t arrange themselves in an appropriate way that isn’t awkward. _Why am I being so awkward_? I run with the best thing I got, which isn’t much by the way, “Where are you planning on sleeping tonight?” I asked. It was stupid I know and the expression on his face is even worse than I thought it’d be. “I was thinking just a small power nap in the big chair in the living room would do. I’ll wait till everyone else is asleep,” he says. “No.” I respond, and he looks slightly rattled by it, “With Simon in that condition, Baz won’t willingly fall asleep. That’s a fight for tomorrow. Sleep in here. There’s at least 3 extra blankets and twelve extra pillows so I’ll take the floor; you take the bed. I might need to go somewhere tomorrow, and I’ll need you on standby if it requires a driver. So, you’ll need a good night’s sleep.” I can see his thoughts as he tries to figure out an argument that will win him the honour of sleeping on the floor. “But-“ he begins. I hold up my hand to stop him. He sucks in a deep breath and sighs, then slowly nods his head in agreement. 

**Shepard**

_She wants to sleep on the floor. What in the world is this woman thinking?_ I mean honestly, I could sleep anywhere and still get plenty of rest. Sleep is sleep. When she said that she wanted me to take the bed I was confused as to why, even her “reason” didn’t make it clear to me. I tried to argue but she held up a disapproving hand to stop me. _I don’t understand this woman…but I want to._ I look at her and realize she’s never going to agree to letting me have the floor. Out of frustration I give a deep sigh and nod my head in a silent agreement. “Good,” she says with a forced smile. She stands up and starts moving blankets and pillows to the floor. I want to keep talking to her.

I’ve been trying for three days to talk to her, get to know her, and now that I finally have a chance, everything I wanted to ask… I don’t take it. The last thing she needs is for me to pester her with silly questions about her life. I have one question that I have to ask, “Simon and Agatha dated?” She looks startled by the fact that I’m breaking the silence, _this is me though I mean silence isn’t exactly my strong suit_, but also the question that I’ve asked. She narrows her eyes, stopping the movement of blankets and pillows alike, “How do you know about them?” she asked. “Agatha mentioned it when we were standing in the kitchen,” I said. She nodded. “I was just asking because-“ she cuts me off, “Just because Simon and Baz are together doesn’t mean Simon can’t have a liking for girls. It’s 2019 Shepard, anything is possible.” That makes me laugh. “That isn’t what I meant. What I was trying – and failing – to say, was that I was surprised to hear that Simon had been with anyone except Baz. They just seem to fit so well together, like puzzle pieces,” I say. She replied, “Everyone used to say that about Simon and Agatha, that they just seemed so… right. Funny enough, Agatha broke up with Simon because she had feelings for Baz. Now that I’ve seen how happy Simon and Baz can be together, there’s no doubt in my mind that they’re each other’s lobsters, not Simon and Agatha.”

**Penelope**

After having an oddly awkward and tiring conversation with Shepard, I decide maybe I’ll try and get some sleep. Shepard helps me lay the pillows and the blankets on the floor, he’s constantly asking me if I’m sure about him taking the bed and every time I reply yes, he seems more and more frustrated by my stubbornness on the matter. Once we get everything laid out, he just stands there looking at me like he wants to say something but is afraid and honestly, I’m afraid too. The look in his eyes suggests a question will be asked that would change this whole situation. Problem is I’m not afraid of him asking… I’m afraid of my answer. I clear my throat and crawl under my floor blankets, quickly getting rid of that open opportunity. He awkwardly turns away realizing he lost his chance and climbs into the bed. I exhale a breath I didn’t know I had been holding and chance a peak over at him. Without actually looking at me, he asks, “Light off?” “Yes Please. Thank you,” is all I manage to croak out. Suddenly the room goes dark and we both go silent. I close my eyes, and for what feels like forever, I toss and turn pulling all the blankets up as high as possible. I forgot to close the window before I got… “comfortable” and now I’m freezing. I’m pretty sure Shepard is asleep, but I wait a few more minutes before getting up to close it.

**Shepard**

The darkness of the room is unusually gloomy. This probably is due to the kind of day we’ve had but when she asked me to turn the light off something sounded different than when she had spoken earlier, almost like she was nervous… like I made her nervous. _That’s new_. I lay there and stare at the ceiling; I can hear her tossing and turning attempting to go to sleep. The window is open, and it chilled the room so much that I almost, almost, was cold. After a little while, I hear her bustle with the blankets and stand up. She quietly walks over to the window, probably thinking I’m asleep, and starts to close it. Suddenly this rush came over me, I don’t know what this feeling is or how to explain it, but it made me sit up and whisper, “Penelope…” it wasn’t a question. She jumps obviously startled by the fact that I’m awake and whispers back, “What? Did you want this open, because I’m cold?” “No um… Penelope… these blankets are warmer. Come sleep under here,” I say. She hesitates, but eventually she’s under the blankets with me, but still shivering. “Come ‘ere. Let me help.” I say. I hold out my arms and slowly she allows herself into them. She stops shivering and eventually I hear her breath go soft and even. Mimicking her, I fall asleep with Penelope Bounce in my arms.

**Agatha**

I was still nauseas and shaking as I climbed into bed last night, but I fell asleep in a matter of minutes. Today is a new day, but I still have to find a way to deal with everything I saw yesterday. I mean first off, Simon and Baz? I never would have seen that coming. Simon was obsessed with Baz the entire time we were at Watford. I mean I broke up with Simon, because I fancied Baz and I thought he felt the same. Now that I think about it Baz spent every year that we were together, trying to brake us up and I thought this was because he wanted me, much like most guys at our school. I don’t understand when or how this all happened but I’m getting there, I think? Okay and second off, when did this lot start prancing around America with a Normal? I had to give the guy my address, and he’s sleeping in my apartment! I don’t know this rando that they brought along with them but so help me if anything ends up stolen or anyone ends up dead, I will not be to blame for it. I need to get my mind off of this, so I put on some guest-friendly pajamas and open my bedroom door. I find Baz hunched over Simon’s limp body asleep, and I almost start crying. It’s 9:30 and I’m kinda hungry, so I decide to make breakfast for everyone. It’s the one thing I can do to help. I’ve gotten really good at making French toast so that’s what I make. I set everything out on the table quietly and got to the guest bedroom to wake up Penny. I knock on the door and walk in to find Penelope and the Normal in bed together (with clothes on) slowly sitting up and yawning. Attempting to pull myself together and not freak out, I look at Penelope and say, “I made French toast.” She nods, and with that I shut the door as quickly and quietly as possible, hurrying back to the kitchen. I’ll let Penelope wake Baz up for food.


	3. Chapter 3

**Baz**

I wake with a startle; Penny’s hand on my shoulder, soft and gentle, the same type of look in her eyes. She looks like she slept pretty well, better than she has the past week, but there’s still an unsettling amount of concern, hidden behind the groggy morning eyes. Concern for Simon, but also for me. I’ve been hunched over all night, so when I finally do sit up a sharp pain goes right up my spine and I wince, taking a deep breath there’s a wonderful smell in the air that wasn’t there when I fell asleep. With a small glance at the kitchen, I see Agatha cooking breakfast, _smells like French toast,_ and Shepard sitting at the table eating. I look at Simon, covered in his own blood still, but also still unconscious. I never thought I would have to see Simon like this, and the sight brings tears to my eyes. Slowly and silently tears fall down my face as I reach for my wand, _I need to keep casting. Maybe I can wake him up. _

I grab my wand off the coffee table and before I can get a single spell off, Penelope grabs my wand hand, holds it in hers and looks me in my tear-filled eyes. Without a word I let her take my wand and walk me to the kitchen for at least some water. It hurts to take my eyes off of him. _What if these are the last moments I have with him Penelope? If he… if I lose him, forget myself. A life without Simon is no life at all._ Even with these thoughts though, I allow her to walk me to the table, pull up a chair, and get me something to drink. I sway and feel lightheaded as I walk and even after I’m sitting and I realize that when I drank those four squirrels last night, they weren’t enough to hold me. I’m going to have to hunt which means leaving Simon.

**Penelope**

Baz’s reluctance to leave Simon to hunt is making me want to kill him. Legit. I know he’s worried out of his mind for Simon, but he needs to hunt. If I could do it for him I would, but I can’t. Eventually he leaves and I’m left with Agatha and Shepard…and my dying best friend. I walk over to Simon and start casting; I mean something has to be helping him, right? Some part of this has to be what’s keeping him alive. Agatha walks over to me and sits to the right of me on the floor. “Penny. I don’t know how long these spells are gonna to hold up, but none of them are going to heal him enough to get him back to England,” she says. After a few moments, “I don’t know what to do,” I admit with tears in my eyes. Shepard walks in and sits in the chair to my left. “Call your mom Penny. Admit that you are in desperate need of help, I’m sure she’ll come help us,” Agatha says gently. I reply, “So, about that…she doesn’t know we’re here. If I call her then yeah, she’ll come and try to save Simon, but then she’ll kill me in his place.” “How long is the flight from London? Maybe Dad will be able to save Simon; I’m just worried about whether or not he can get here in time. From the looks of it, Simon doesn’t have much time left…” Agatha says with tearful eyes. She’s right. I know she is, but honestly, what can we do? “What about…Baz…?”Shepard says thoughtfully. “What about him?” I snap, “Simon’s the one dying on Agatha’s couch,” lifting my hand in the direction of the couch. “No. I mean would Baz…be able to save Simon…by turning him?” Shepard says. “Fuck. No.” says a voice from the doorway – Baz.

**Agatha **

I never heard the door open, but I know for a fact Baz heard what the Normal – Shepard – said. “Fuck. No.” he croaks loudly from the doorway, his voice clearly filling with fear or anger or both. He all but slams my front door shut, looking ready for battle. “Do you even know what that would do to him? Can you even comprehend what you’re suggesting we do?” Baz shouts at Shepard. Penny and I are standing now, not sure of what’s going to happen next. “Look I know you don’t want to even contemplate it Baz, but Simon is dying. No mage strong enough to possibly heal him would get here before he dies. We have to consider all of our options,” Shepard says choosing his words cautiously. Baz takes a deep breath and looks at Simon, not taking his eyes off of him as he says, “That…is not an option.” He walks past us all to the kitchen grabbing a piece of French toast and carrying it in his hands back to the chair at Simon’s side. _What in the world is happening right now?_

Penny and I go to the kitchen and clean up breakfast dishes. I have so many questions I want to ask her, but she has that look on her face; she’s worried, she doesn’t have a plan and it’s starting to scare her. I can see it in her eyes the entire time we stand at the sink – me washing, her drying – possibly for the first time in her life, Penelope Bounce has no clue what to do to fix this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here's the thing about this chapter... it's shorter than I intended it to be, compared to say chapter 2. It is currently Thursday night and unfortunately I won't be able to write AT ALL this weekend... I'm going to my dad's house and am not allowed to take my computer with me. *sad face* So... in conclusion... what I'm trying to say.... the note in last chapter said that I'm gonna be uploading on a wacky ass schedule, but apparently the length of the chapters are gonna be pretty wacky too. :/
> 
> Enjoy!~ A.V.
> 
> P.S. I am unfortunately aware of the fact that the format of these chapters is subtlety but also high key different across all 3....I honestly get really frustrated with it bc when I upload it some things transfer and some things dont and then it looks dumb but it's always 12:00 pm and I have to be awake at 5:30 am...yay me so yeah broskis I'm aware, I'm sorry, and I'm tired. Goodnight!


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big huge thanks to Marisah (@_you_were_the_sun on Instagram)! you've been such a big help on writing this and I can't say thankyou enough! The hype I feel every time we talk about this story is unreal so thank you, thank you, thank you, I hope you enjoy your plot twists!

**Penelope**

_What if he’s right? I can’t lose Simon; he’s my best friend and I will do anything to save him. If this is the only way to save him then maybe, we do have to consider it. If we do it though… what will he say when he wakes up? Is it worth it? Which one is worse; Simon being dead, or Simon being alive and hating us, all of us?_

Agatha and I finished dishes half an hour ago and here we sit; Baz casting on Simon, Shepard, Agatha and me at the table. “I have to talk to Baz. There has to be something that we can do, because those spells he’s casting aren’t working,” I say, they nod their heads in silent agreement. It takes me a few moments to compose myself enough for this argument, but eventually I walk over carrying a second chair. I set it next to him; he looks up at me with tears in his eyes and for the first time, his walls come down. Vulnerable and scared, Baz crumbles into me silently sobbing. It’s in this moment I realize why he doesn’t want to do this; he never got a chance to say it, but he loves Simon more than anything in this life, and he doesn’t believe Simon would forgive him.

I wholeheartedly believe he’s wrong. Simon never got to say it either and now here he is, hanging on by the last strand. “Baz…” I say lifting his head from my lap so he can look me in the eyes, see how scared I am too. My eyes fill with water and my vision blurs, but I push through and say what needs to be said, “Baz, you have to save him. There’s no other choice. Magic isn’t working and if we don’t do something fast, he will die.” He shakes his head as tears stream down his entire face. “Baz… please…” I’m crying and pleading with him, hoping he’ll see what I see.

He turns away from me and continues to cast; still not uttering a word. I stare at Simon’s lifeless face for about 20 minutes just remembering the golden glow it normally has. Then, out of nowhere Simon starts to shake, violently. Baz looks at me and I him, neither of us know what’s happening. Shepard and Agatha run over to the couch after hearing all the noise. In a few seconds Shepard spit out a diagnosis, “ he’s having a seizure. We need to get him flat on his back. Penelope, see if you can find a pulse on him.” Everyone starts to move. Baz and him gently, but quickly, lower Simon to the floor and I reach for his neck and wrist trying for a pulse anywhere. After about 30 seconds I get scared; I can’t find a pulse. “Shepard,” I say my voice shaking as much as Simon right now, “I can’t find one, what do we do? Is he okay? Please…” Shepard looks from me and then to Baz, “Can you hear it?” Baz looks up at him confused. “His heartbeat, can you hear how weak/strong or fast/slow it is,” Shepard says quickly. I can hear the fear and anger rising in his voice. “Guys, we need to call an ambulance. He could die, we need professionals,” Agatha says. “Agatha, are you crazy? What would we say?! He has wings and a tail; good heavens, no we can’t call an ambulance,” I say. Baz turn towards us, “It’s there but its faint. He’s dying.”

**Baz**

_The love of my life is going to die. And I’m too chicken to do what needs to be done to save him._

The beautiful golden colour of his skin is almost as hard to see as his heartbeat is hard to hear. Agatha reaches for her mobile even though Penny told her not to. I start casting even though Penny told me not to. I think of the most powerful healing spells and push all of my magic into them hoping they work. Penny and Agatha are shouting at each other so loud it’s almost deafening, and I can’t bear the madness any longer, “All of you SHUT UP!” And then they do, they stare at me blankly as I say, “He’s _dying_. Why in the world are we arguing over what to do! Yes, we need a plan and yes, we need it quick. However, arguing and fighting with one another isn’t going to help Simon.” It takes a moment of just standing around, but then Penny comes rushing to my side, grasping me hard on the shoulders and shaking me every few words as she says, “Baz, do it. Turn him. Once he heals maybe we can find a way to change him back,” I go to cut her off, but she doesn’t let me, “He will die. We cannot _let_ Simon die. You have to do it _now._”

I look her in the eyes, and I know in my mind she’s telling the truth, there is not other way to save him. I just can’t bear the thought of what he will say and how angry he will be once he wakes up. I start crying as I nod my head, finally giving in, not wanting my precious Simon to suffer any longer. “Okay,” is all she says, pulling me into a tight embrace knowing that I just made the hardest decision of my life. I lift my head to look at her and see tears in her eyes as I ask, “Can we have the room? I don’t think I can do it with all of you in here…Penelope…I’m going to kill him, just so that he can live. How ironic is that?” She nods and laughs as more tears fall down her face. We stay like that a little while longer until she tells me that we probably shouldn’t wait any longer. She gets up and gathers the other two. They nod and silently walk out the front door, resting their hands on my shoulder as they go. And then there were two.

I gaze down at Simon and start to whisper to him, “My love, I just want you to know, in case you can hear me, I love you so so much. I don’t want to do this, but I can’t live with myself if I continue to do nothing. This was the hardest decision ever and I truly wish we had never been put in this situation. When you wake up, provided that you don’t hate me, I promise to always be by your side if you’ll have me. I feel so responsible for what has happened to you and I will never, ever let something like this happen to you again. Simon Snow, I love you so damn much it will be the absolute death of me, but not of you. I will forever miss the golden glow of your skin and the everlasting warmth of your body, but at least I’ll keep those eyes in my life, at least I’ll have you in my life. I love you, please forgive me.” I kiss him on the lips, hard. I pull away hoping for a Disney movie ending, but alas there is none. Tears continue to stream down my face as I put my lips to his neck and apologize once more, kissing him there and then…

_I can’t believe I just did that. The one thing I never thought possible. I turned Simon Snow into a vampire._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was an emotionally taxing chapter... as usual I'm not sure when I will have time to write/post chapter 5. Thanks for being so patient!  
:)  
Enjoy! ~A.V.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sneak peak announcement ! :)

Check out this same story on Wattpad for a sneak peek at what's to come. The name is WaywardWriters. Story is Afterward. Just thought you beautiful people should have a lil sum sum...  
:)  
Enjoy!~A.V.


	6. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Nayashi the midnight tech support person who got everything restored to its original state so that I could finally post.   
(The chapter #s are going to be a little off because of the sneak peak announcement)

**Simon**

  
_I’m running through a forest trying to get to him; I hear him calling my name leading me. He keeps saying my name and then wa- …then my name and wake- …then my name and wake u- …then my name and wake up… wake up… wake up… Simon-_

  
-Wake up. I open my eyes and see who it was whispering my name, Baz. I blink a few times making sure it’s real and not another twisted dream._ Dreams? They all felt so real._ He’s crying. Baz never cries, so something awful must have happened. One moment he was staring into my eyes, the next his lips connecting with mine so passionately, _we haven’t kissed like this in months._ It’s passionate, hungry, and desperate, but also kind, loving, and gentle; I’ve missed kissing like this. He pulls away with tears still in his eyes, looking at me like I’m the miracle. I open my mouth to say his name, but nothing is able to come out; just this strange wheezing sound. It’s painful and I immediately regret it.

  
The door opens and Agatha, Penny and Shepard walk through. Penny pauses a second and looks to Baz like they’re sharing a secret, then turns her attention back to me and practically jumps over the coffee table to hug me. She squeezes a little too tight and I’m suddenly aware of everything: how tight my muscles are, the blood stains all over my shirt and pants, and my wings and tail are gone. _Maybe Penny spelled them away again._ Once again, I open my mouth to speak to say anything but, I end up coughing instead. Everyone immediately looks up at me with the largest amount of concern in their eyes I’ve seen since everything with the Mage. Since I can’t speak, I motion I need a drink and Agatha goes to get me a glass of water. She looks good, more tan than she was, a little sleep deprived, but her hair is white as ever and her skin as radiant as the lights of a Christmas tree. She comes back and I drink the entire glass, plus three refills. My throat feels much better; it’s still quite scratchy as I say, “Baz, what happened?” He looks at me and I can see his eyes are still wet from crying. I search his face for any indication of what happened but, all I see is how concerned he is for me. “I can explain everything to you later. Right now, you probably need some more water and you have to be starving,” he says, and right on cue my stomach makes a weird gurgling growl sound. 

  
**Agatha**

  
Simon’s awake. He looks like hell but, that’s to be expected. He wants to know what happened, which begs the question,_ what is Baz going to tell him?_ Baz’s first priority is making sure he’s in full health which means feeding him.

Simon Snow is like the goats he used to help take care of, he will eat anything. I go to the kitchen and grab a glass down out of the cupboard. I fill it with a little bit of water, and I take some headache medicine. The others work to help Simon off the ground and back onto my, now blood stained, couch. I take a look in my fridge and realize all I had was the stuff for French toast this morning. As I walk into my living room, I realize how quiet they’ve been. I mean Simon can’t really talk but, the others? I thought they would be filing him in on what happened while he was out. 

  
“Hey, Penny can you come here for a sec,” I say. She stands up really fast like she couldn’t wait to get out of that room. She wobbles as she walks into the kitchen saying, “Yeah, what’s up?” “If I give you some money can you and Shepard go to the store and grab some stuff, I’ll make a list,” I say already pulling out the paper and pen, not really giving her a chance to reply. “Yeah, of course,” she says with a strange smile on her face, almost like she’s giddy and embarrassed at the same time. 

  
When we were out in the hall, she gave me the short version of what their trip had been like, which included her breakup with Micha. Suddenly seeing her and Shepard sharing the bed makes sense and after hearing what Micha did to her, I fully support whatever this is with Shepard. I don’t really feel like leaving and Penelope seems like she can’t wait, I want her to take Shepard because I don’t think she’s at full strength and at this point we will probably have eyes on us. I’m going to make a rule that we leave the apartment in pairs to ensure the safety of one another. 

  
I make the list and give it to Penny. “Thanks guys,” I say as the grab their jackets and head out the door. Simon looks worried because Baz still won’t tell him what happened. I think he’s afraid to tell him what he had to do. _How long can he put off telling him though?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI guys, its been a while. I had writers block for the entire month of November. The reason being was that after that cliff hanger, I wasn't sure how to take the story where I wanted it. Thank you all for being so patient with me and my lousy updates and I'm really, really, sorry if this chapter wasn't it for y'all. I promise this was my warm up and soon enough we will be back to our regularly scheduled programing.


	7. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, many apologies if the formatting is wonky.

**Baz **

_ He'__s hungry, of course __he is, but __how long can he put off his first hunt? How long can I wait to tell him? Maybe I don’t have to tell him at all__; is it selfish that I don’t want to tell him? _ _ I just I _ _ can’t _ _ bear the thought of what he’ll say. __I’m __glad I can look into those beautiful blue eyes__, but I hate myself for what I did. _My eyes start to tear up as I stare at him, but he’s so full of this new found energy, that he doesn’t notice the tears streaming down my face. Agatha does though and I can see the mix of confusion but also understanding on her face. If Penelope were here right now, I’m confident she could help me find a way to tell him, but she isn’t. So here I sit, wallowing in self-hate as the man I’ve been in love with for years has been all but resurrected from the lifeless state he was in just a few short hours ago. 

**Penelope**

Shepard and I walk side by side to the store. We don’t speak. His presence reminds me of Micah’s, which reminds me of Micah, who I still can’t believe is no longer a part of my life. For the longest time, when I pictured my future it always had two people who were consistent: Simon and Micah. First, I somehow lose Micah and then Simon almost… I’m worried about him. Baz says that he won’t feel the effects of the change for a few more hours like the strength and the hunger. I see it in his eyes when he looks at Simon that he hates himself for what he’s brought upon him. Shepard doesn’t do much by way of talking to any of us. I think that for the first time, he’s talking less and listening more. He’s probably learned a lot about our group by now. 

I think he was waiting for me to break the silence which I do when we walk into the store. “If we split up and get half the list each, this will go faster,” I say. He looks around the store and says, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.” I look at him as I slowly reach into my pocket for my ring, but he waves me off saying, “No I don’t think there’s danger but on the off chance that there is we’d do better together.” I nod. He grabs a basket and I pull out the list as we make our way up and down the aisles. He tries to read over my shoulder but ultimately, he’s too tall and I’m too short. “Why does she need...” he takes the list from me, “butter, flour and jam?” “She’s going to make Simon his favorite,” I say, “scones.” He chuckles and I playfully elbow him saying, “What? What’s so funny about scones?” He just shakes his head and says, “You guys are so British.” I just smile and roll my eyes as we walk through the store. 

On the way back to Agatha’s I decide maybe a conversation wouldn’t be so bad. “Hey, can I ask you a question?” I say. “You just did,” he says with a playful smile on his face, “but yes you may ask another.” I pause, then after a long moment say, “Why stick around with us if we can’t do anything to help you?” He stops and then I do too. “You don’t get it. I’ve talked to every mage in America that I can find but then I stubble upon you lot and I’m given hope again that maybe there’s stuff you guys know that the American mages don’t.” I realize what he means and when I go to refute what he’s said, he stops me. “Look I don’t want to put any pressure on you guys but if there is anything new that I can learn, I’m going to take that chance. Penelope, I believe I have a lot of stuff to learn from you, even if it doesn’t help me with my curse. You three are something new to me. I want to learn every detail. You especially strike an interest in me that I’ve never had for anything else. Penelope, I like you a lot and I want to get to know you more.” I just stand there. Not sure what to do next because I’m honestly taken aback by his answer. He just turns and we go back to walking in silence. 

When we return to the apartment, we hear laughter as we open the door with the groceries. Happy to see us back, and with food, Simon greets us at the door, taking the groceries and delivering them to Agatha’s counter. I dig the spare money out of my pocket to give back to Agatha but she waves me off saying, “You guys are gonna need that more than me right now. Keep it Penny.” I awkwardly nod and place the money back in my pocket. Shepard walks over to the counter busying himself with taking the groceries out of the bag. I plop down in a chair next to Simon and tell them about the weird people I saw at the grocer. 

**Baz**

Agatha makes us a delicious lunch and afterward I leave for a few hours to hunt. I tell them it’ll be a while so that I can find something good that will hold me off for a while. I also just want to be alone for a while. The guilt of not being able to tell Simon is getting heavier and heavier as the day goes on. I find a wooded area a few miles away from Agatha’s flat and I'm surprised how quickly I was able to find a deer; I drained it dry then found a few squirrels and drained them as well. Then I just walked around, meandering the streets around her building. 

She lives in a rather nice neighborhood actually. The people seem nice and there’s lots of stores and places I've never heard of. It’s quite fascinating actually; I saw strawberries the size of my palm, girls wearing barley any clothes holding up other clothes to their body for their friends to see, and an older looking man sitting on a bucket playing the guitar. He wears sunglasses, a hat, a baggy t-shirt, shorts, and flip flops and long greasy brown hair hanging right around his shoulders. I stop and listen to his music and it reminds me of a song my step mother used to have playing in the kitchen while she cooked. It's strange how hard nostalgia can hit on a street corner in an unfamiliar state in a strange country. 

When I get back to the flat, I'm surprised at the lack of noise that has been a constant since Simon got better. Shepard is sitting on the couch and Penelope is in a large comfy chair, both watching the television. “Where's Simon,” I ask, the question directed at penny but Shepard replies, “Having a private chat with Agatha in her bedroom.” Annoyed at both Shepard being the one to tell me this and the fact that it’s happening I go to the kitchen, fill a glass of water and drink it as I stare down Agatha’s door wondering what’s happening on the other side of it. _ Surely nothing to worry about. _Unconvinced I turn and walk back to the living room and plop down on the couch on the end opposite of Shepard. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being so absent with this story. I've been really busy lately, but due to the impending coronacation we've all been blessed with I have the motivation to write again. It's good to be back yall :)  
~A.V.


	8. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is packed with drama. It also kicks off the main part of the story. I hope yall enjoy this one because I enjoyed writing it.

**Simon **

Shortly after Baz left to hunt, Agatha pulled me aside and asked if we could talk privately. As we walked into her bedroom and she shut the door I thought this was going to be something about how Baz and I are together. I was wrong. 

The look on her face scares me. “Agatha what is it?” I ask. She looks at me then sighs. She sits on the edge of her king size bed and stares me in the eyes. “Simon, after everything that happened last year, I had to get out. You know that. I learned something interesting before all hell broke loose and I think this is something you should hear,” she says to me slow and careful like something big is coming. “Okay whatever it is I can handle it; tell me,” I say. 

“At Christmas I went to spend time with Penny, just to hang out since she knew neither of us could be with you that Christmas she wanted to have some fun, Penny and I decorated cookies and we talked with her mum a bit about the Mage,” she says that last part slow and careful, clearly unsure of how I will react. I don’t so she continues on, “Penny’s mum went to school with the Mage. She said back then they called him Davy. She told us that he had a girlfriend when they were at school, her name was Lucy, but after school, she moved to America. I came here to search for her. I wanted to run but I wanted to know how to stay away. So, I looked. I did a ton of research and... she never came here Simon. Lucy has never stepped foot in America. I don’t know if she’s still alive but when I did the research something felt weird,” she pauses to give me a second to take all this in. I stare at the floor and wonder how it was possible the Mage had ever loved someone and never told anyone about it, especially me. He treated me like a son and I honestly never knew the man. 

Agatha stands up and walks to her dresser and digs around for something. Once she’s found it, she walks back over and sits on the bed. She hands me a photograph. “The one on the end is Penny’s mum, and that’s the Mage, Davy, on the other end. The girl in the middle is Lucy,” she says slowly, looking at me. I stare at the photograph of this young girl who has her arm around the Mage. The first thing I noticed was her eyes, they were bluer than any shade of blue I had ever seen. She never needed to smile with eyes like those. She has golden blonde hair that hangs at her shoulders and the longer I stare at this photo the more I begin to understand why Agatha is telling me this. I look just like them. 

**Agatha**

I wait hoping that he understands what I’m trying to say. Turned out that Simon was never the chosen one to begin with. So why was the Mage so sure? Why did he take such specific interest in Simon? “Agatha... I see what you’re trying to get at but it feels like your grasping at straws. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about the Mage. Every word he has ever said to me is constantly in the back of my mind. Everything I ever learned. He was like a father to me and now you’re suggesting that he really was my father? And that this Lucy person is my mum?” he stares at the ground as he asks all these questions that I have no answers for, then he turns to me with tears slowly streaming down his face, “If you’re right and he was my father, then... why did I grow up alone? Why was I always alone?” The tears are no longer slow. 

I pull him into me and give him a place to cry, I owe it to him considering I caused this. Now I'm realizing that I made a mistake doing this, coming to him with nothing solid. I realized I opened the most painful wound Simon has carried. Not knowing who his parents really are. 

**Simon **

I don’t really know why I started crying. Years ago, I made peace with never knowing who my birth parents were. So, I compose myself and I pull myself away from Agatha’s shoulder realizing how weird it was I was crying on her. We haven’t spoken much since everything that happened with the Mage so maybe this is going to be awkward. I wipe my face and turn to her, “Can I keep the picture? Just in case?” She nods her head, “Of course Simon, I'm sorry I brought this up, I just wanted you to know.” “It’s fine.” I say simply. And it is. I’m not mad at her. I think maybe instead of just lying on the couch like I was before we came on this stupid trip, I might look into this a little more. “Not gonna lie Agatha you’ve sparked my interest.” 

**Baz **

“I'm hungry,” Bunce complains from the big chair next to me. “Careful,” I say, “You’re beginning to sound like Snow,” I say to her. She just sticks her tongue out at me and smiles. I sneer. “I could order us a pizza,” Shepard interjects himself into our conversation. “Okay! Pepperoni? Right Baz?” she asks. I turn my attention back to the telly and nod my head to show my disinterest. 

Shepard picks up the landline and calls some random pizza place. Once he’s done on the phone, he walks back over to the couch, sits down and says,” It’ll be here in 20 minutes.” Bunce look at him and smiles, he smiles back. I’ve been a little preoccupied with Simon the past few days so they don’t think I've taken notice to the difference in their dynamic. I have. 

Five minutes later, the door to Agatha’s room opens and Simon walks out followed by Agatha. I see his red puffy eyes and I know that he’s been crying. It takes every ounce of self-control I possess not to jump up and start with the accusations running through my head. Instead I just watch trying to catch Simon’s eye, and succeeding. He nods to me reassure me that he’s okay. I get up and go to the kitchen, just as Agatha tries to sit on the couch between Shepard and me. I fill my glass with water again because my mouth is dry. 

Every time I look at Simon, I see what I did to him. And the lie I've been telling myself about everything being okay when it’s not. I’m just a coward. With that realization I make a beeline for that front door because I need some fresh air. “Baz where-” I don’t know who I'm cutting off as I shut the door, but I don’t stop. I can’t. The last thing I saw was the confused look on his face and I had to get out of there. I was suffocating under the lies. 

I decide to go up instead of down. Hoping to god that this building opens to the roof and am so, so grateful to learn that it does. I take in a breath and am relieved by the cool, barely nighttime air. It’s fresh on my face and I can relax a little. I walk to the edge and take in the sights of the city. I pull myself up on the ledge and take a seat. Just to get comfortable. I look out and see hints of the ocean in the distance. I look below and see people absentmindedly walking past. I wonder about how easy their lives must be. No monsters or magic. No vampires or dead zones. No handsome boyfriends with dragon wings and a tail. I think about how easy it is to love someone. No extra complications. I hope for that type of normalcy for Simon and me after I tell him. Lucky me I see a shooting star and wish on it for just that. 


	9. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING!!!!! There is a brief mention of suicide in the first few paragraphs of this chapter (under Baz POV) if that is something that triggers you or could upset you in anyway just skip over that. You can start reading again at "Simon walks up to me..." You wont miss anything important I promise.  
Otherwise, Enjoy :)

**Baz**

I watched as the sun went down and the stars came out. The cool air that drifts from the ocean at night dances in the light wind and I just take it all in. I was so peacefully distracted that I didn’t hear him come up until he said, “Baz? What are you doing? Why are you on the ledge?” _ Simon _. I wait a moment and collect my thoughts. It's now or never. 

“Simon, I have to tell you something,” I say waiting for his approval to continue. 

“Baz just come off the ledge and whatever it is we’ll talk about it. Yeah?” he says. It's clear that he thinks I might jump or something. That isn't why I came here though so I swing my legs to the other side and stay where I am. This is comfortable. “Simon I'm not... suicidal,” I say with a sarcastic sigh. I know he only wants me to be safe because he cares but I feel like I'm back at Watford having to tip to around his feelings and confusion. 

Simon walks up to me and is just a few inches away from the ledge. For a moment I thought he was going to come kiss me. Instead, it's me that closes the gap between us. As our lips connect in a long passionate kiss, I know that it won’t last so I drag it on for as long as he will let me before he pulls away. He looks confused and I know that he feels conflicted about the kiss. In the past few months, the whole year really, Simon has almost always been the one to pull away. I missed those long fiery kisses we used to share. 

I break the silence and say, “Simon I have to talk to you about something really serious.” I walk back to the ledge and sit where I was before. It takes a moment for his focus to come back to me. I look to him waiting for him to say something anything. He doesn’t. All he does is look at me still confused about the kiss but listening to what I'm saying. 

I continue with the speech I prepared in my mind as I watched the sun go down. “Simon when you were sick and injured, we um we couldn’t take you to the hospital for obvious reasons,” I say pointing at his wings, “So It was just us here pouring every bit of magic into healing spells for you, but it all felt temporary. You weren’t making any progress. I couldn't think straight, all of my energy and brainpower were going to being worried about you and _ if _ you would wake up,” I pause and let him take in what I've said so far. He nods his head in understanding. He moves to sit next to me on the ledge and I let him. I don’t think I can say it to his face. 

“Everyone downstairs approached me with an idea. It guaranteed that your life would be saved but I knew it wasn’t what you would’ve wanted. I tried to think of any other way, but I just couldn’t and-” he cuts me off, “Baz... what did you do?” I see him out of the corner of my eye trying to get me to look at him but I can’t. I already feel him slipping from me, so I continue, “Simon, it was selfish and I'm sorry, but it was the only way...” I turn to him and move aside the collar of his shirt where the marks of my fangs still show. He looks down at them and realization hits, “No. Baz no you didn’t. You wouldn’t.” He looks at me and I look away ashamed. 

His anger building, he says to me, “You did it, didn’t you? A-And and what you thought you could just go about your day not telling me? How could you keep something like this from me! ...Oh my God, and everyone else knew too. You all kept this a secret from me ALL DAY? Bloody hell Baz,” he says and I finally look at him and there's so much pain in his eyes I think it might kill me. 

And I'm the one that caused this. 

**Simon**

_ They all knew. _

Baz finally looks at me searching my eyes for forgiveness that I just don’t have to offer right now. Speechless and trying to form a sentence I stutter as I say, “I- I can’t even... look at you right now.” And I turn and walk away. 

The door to the roof slams shut behind me as I quickly make my way back to Agatha’s apartment. I know it’ll only be a few minutes if even that before Baz is on my heels begging me not to go and to sit down and talk. When I get to the apartment, I go to Penelope in the kitchen and say, “I'm leaving. Do you have the tickets?” She looks at me confused like she doesn’t know what I’m talking about. “Baz told me what you all chose to do to “save” my life,” I say with my anger once again rising. Her eyes widen with worry as she tries to think of something to say. 

“Save it Penny. You didn’t tell me and there isn't much you can do right now to make up for that except helping me get a ticket home,” I say. She fumbles around with her words a second before saying, “Simon I don’t have the tickets yet, I didn’t know when we were going to leave, so I haven't bought them yet. Simon maybe just take a seat and we can talk about this.” “What is there to talk about Penelope?! You’re my best friend and you kept this huge secret from me all day. All of you did. Not one of you had the decency to tell me the truth!” I yell at her in anger. Agatha and Shepard Have appeared in the doorway to the kitchen and they stand there silently. “Any you...” I say pointing at Agatha, “... you HAD a chance to tell me and you didn’t.” She opens her mouth to say something but closes it again before anything comes out. 

I turn back to Penelope and say, “Give me the money that you were going to use for my ticket.” She looks at me and walks over to her coat where she keeps the large amount of American money that she both stole and magicked. She hands me some of it and says, “That's four hundred American dollars that will get you home and will buy you a few cheap meals on the way.” “Thank you,” I say coldly as I turn and go to the bathroom to take a shower and freshen up before going to the airport. 

When I come out of the bathroom, Baz is sitting on the couch, he stands up suddenly like in the bloody queen or something. He walks over to me but I ignore him. Penelope stands up and walks over to me and casts a cloaking spell on my wings. She hands me some weird looking rock and she tells me that she engineered it to keep the cloaking spell on my wings for the next 72 hours. She tells me that it will only work if the rock is touching somewhere on my body at all times. I nod my head in understanding. I don’t know how she did it and I honestly don’t care at this point. 

Shepard walks downstairs with me and doesn’t say anything. He just shows me how to hail a cab American style and I'm on my way to the airport. Leaving all of them in the dust. 

My heart aches of loneliness and anger. 


	10. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm baaaccckkkk!!!!!  
:)

**Simon **

I have no idea where to go. I had to get out of there, leave him. This was inevitable, our breakup, but never did I ever imagine that he would be the one to ruin it for us. That was supposed to be my job. He should have let me die. He was so selfish to do what he did and now I'm alone. 

I watch large buildings pass from the back of the cab. The twinkling lights on all the floors of the buildings shine bright in contrast to the dark summer night sky, I suppose in a city like this it could never truly be dark. 

Too quickly I'm at the airport again, and am reminded that I don’t know what I'm doing and have no way to defend myself. Not that I think they would let me carry a sword on the airplane anyway, but still, it would be a comfort. Through the doors I stand and watch all of the bustling people around me. It seems that airports are always busy, 24 hours a day there are people coming and going. The amount of people alarms me, but I can't - won’t - go back to them for help. It hurts to even think their names, when I close my eyes, I see their faces. 

I slowly make my way through the process of buying my ticket home, though I'm not sure I really want to be there. This is what I get for not making something of myself this last year: alone and homeless. It’s 10:30pm and my flight isn't for another hour and a half so I sit and wait and watch as people walk past and I wonder to myself about their lives and how simple it must be for them. No vampire boyfriend who turned you, no magic stone hiding your wings and tail. I wonder how many of them were orphans, and how many got to find out who their parents were and what happened to them. That’s what I want. When I get back to London, I'm going to figure out who my parents are. I pull the picture Agatha gave me out of my pocket and as I stare at it, I realize the only thing I know for sure is that I need to find out what really happened and where I came from. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thankyou for your patience I know this is a short chapter, but I've had some recent inspiration and I'm pleased to say I'll be posting another update soon and I can't promise anything regular update but I want you guys to know I haven't given up on this story.


End file.
